Reminder

Babe, I'm getting you that bra.


Oh, and P.S, today was absolutely amazing thatks to you <3

Black Tank and Black Shorts...

... is the sexiest combination that my most beloved can ever possibly wear.

... was on my beloved yesterday.

... looks soooooooo nice on my boyfriend.

... hooray for it!! xD

<3

Wedding Day.

Today is my sister's wedding day and I FINALLY got home from dinner. Oh my goodness... My feet hurt. my left knee hurts. Ugh... I'm MAD tired. It's CRAZY.
Well, yeah.
Just an update.
I have photos of the wedding, lunch and hopefully dinner up on my Facebook.
Thanks, guys!!
Good night. =]

WTF

Today is definitely a “wtf” day. So, this morning, I woke up and found out that the game between Portugal and Korea was a 7-zip game. And I didn’t even watch it. I just found out that Korea got their ass whooped. It was amazing. Someone should’ve taken a picture of my family’s faces. Everyone was like… “O.O” before going “What. The. FAWK.”
And just now, my love IMed me and told me he wanted to die. Because his stomach hurt really badly. Really, babe? Really? I don’t mind though. I love you. ♥
After all this, my sister told me to print out the seating chart for my older sister’s wedding party. My mom made like… two comments and we had to change like… 15 thousand things. Anyways, it was a pain in everyone’s butt. And then my dad went and said some people were coming too. Then we had to change even more stuff. But whatever. My older sister doesn’t really care about me and all so I’ll just let my younger sister do it. Not like anyone needs me in this house anymore.
Kevin just told me that he broke his cousin’s door. Another “wtf” moment. xD
And my dad just asked what’s the name of the avenue on the west side of Central Park.

Me: Central Park West.
Dad: I need the name of it.
Me: Central Park West.
Dad: Well? What’s the name of it?
Me: I already told you. It’s Central Park West.
Dad: …
Me: Grraaarrrrrrhhh~!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah…
I love you people.

Randoms

I love you, Sharon Ho, so much... so so so much. You're the greatest
thing to ever walk into my life, and I damn sure am not going to let you
ever walk out of it. Babe, you mean absolutely everything to me, I can't
stress enough how happy you make me, though there's so much stress in my
life. You really have saved me and kept me motivated to survive and move
on. I know we have our little misunderstandings, but like you said, we
move on so quickly, and forget that it ever happened. I love you, wifey
:3. I won't ever hurt you like everyone else has, I'll rather get killed
before I ever hurt you, I can't stand seeing you the slightest bit
upset, that's why I always panic whenever you're upset.
I can't wait until you're my wife.
I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you.
Love, your hubby. x3
--netzfan4life

i like ur hair !! :)

O.o
Mad random. Thanks! =]

Ask me anything

You're clearly everyones rebound girl. Hence, your last name.

Woah, wait. Did I hurt your pride with that answer? Sure, call me a ho but hey, I was born with this name. Sticks and stones, man. But since you have such courage to talk shit about my last name, go say it to Kevin's face. Wait, no, come say it in mine. I don't mind. I've dealt with this all my life but if you were born with this name, I'm pretty sure you'd be bawling on the floor, snot all over your face while people picked on you about your name. Come say shit in my face, bitch. Come do it.

Ask me anything

Kevin looks so much better with Natalia

Oh, I don't know about that. He looks so much happier when he's with me. But, if you care for her so much, why don't you go date her? I'm sure you'll find out why he got over her so quickly. Besides, I'm pretty sure if you care for her so much, you'd look better with her. Aren't I right, Kevin, love?

Ask me anything

:l

My love made me sad today... she was so distant and didn't seem as
cheery... she barely spoke to me and didn't even put an away up when she
went to sleep... me so sad...
she hasn't really been that emotional either recently... I have been
really emotional but it seems like she's not as emotional as she used to
be before... :[
me sad...
*tear
but don't worry, I forgive you, love.
I still love you. :3 <3
--netzfan4life

Nothing happened, I was fine a d no one broke in. I still wonder who was
out there though and what they were doing.
--netzfan4life

my mom isn't taking it seriously, she's saying to go to sleep but I
don't know if I should. I don't know... fuck it, I'll sleep, I could
still hear a pounding but if she won't take me seriously than whatever.
I hope nothing happens, I'm sure I'll be fine. Good night, I'll blog in
the morning.
I love you, Sharon.
please don't worry, I'll be fine. <3
--netzfan4life

they're still outside, but they're not hitting the door as much. I think
I'm okay.
I love you, Sharon.
--netzfan4life

I have the biggest knife I found, I still hear banging, yelling, and a
car. I'm so scared, I hope nothing happens. I hate this. I love you,
Sharon, so much. I'll be okay, I promise.
I love you, I'll always be with you, beloved.
please don't worry too much.
--netzfan4life

fuck.

someone's trying to break into my house I think. I don't know what I
should do. im going to get a knife, I'll post in the morning if
everything's okay. fuck
--netzfan4life

love.

Today definitely wasn't the best day I've ever had, hell, it actually
might be one of the worst. Yes, I got to buy my graduation suit. Yes, I
got to go to the gym and power lift again, and yes, my cousin finally
became a man, but because I was so busy, and because my love was so
busy, we barely got to talk today. I really think that this is the least
amount of time we spent talking to one another since the day before snow
day. I hated it, I missed her and still miss her so damn badly... the
whole time I was gone, all I was thinking about was my love, how she was
doing, what she was doing, and how her bitch ass family was treating
her. After about 7 hours of picking out a suit, I finally got home. I
had sent a picture of me in the suit for Sharon, and went on my way.
When I got home, I was so happy to get to talk to her again, I was so
excited. I love her so much. We spoke for a bit, and she sent me a reply
to my picture. I was really hoping she'd be in awe, and love it, bur
instead, she says, "hehe! you look silly. Don't they have a solid black?
And a darker red?" When I read that, I felt crushed, I was hurt almost
as badly as when she lied to be a month ago. I got really upset and told
her how upset I was. She said she liked it and silly was good, but I
still didn't believe it, I thought she thought I looked stupid and
didn't like the suit at all. She told me again how she liked it, and I
still didn't believe her. She got really upset and went on about how I
didn't believe her and didn't trust her anymore. We went from excited,
to upset, and I hated every second of it, and I can't stand when we're
upset with each other. She kept telling me how she wasn't surprised how
I didn't trust her anymore, saying that she knew I'd be like everyone
else and stop trusting her. She also said how though she wasn't
surprised, she was upset because the guy she loves and cherishes doesn't
believe a word out of her mouth. That so isn't true.
Yes, I do misunderstand a lot that you say, but I really don't get upset
at you for it, love. I know we say we look silly all the time, but I was
just really looking forward to impressing you, and silly wasn't the
answer I was looking for, so I got upset and said what I did. I don't
want us to change, love. I love your opinions, I love being silly with
you, I love everything and I don't want one thing different. I love you
so much, hun. I trust you and I'll always trust you, if I didn't, I
wouldn't have given you my heart like this, I wouldn't have allowed
myself to fall so hard for you. Baby, I'm sorry you got so upset after
being so excited to talk to me. I'm really sorry and I promise I'll be
more understanding and try to calm down more. I'm really sorry, babe...
please feel better tomorrow... I miss you, I love you, I really really
do...
I feel so bad...
--netzfan4life

This thing called life wouldn't be worth living, if I wouldn't be living
it with you. Babe... I love you so damn much... I know so many people
try separating us, but it'll never work. It's fate, we are meant to be
and no one could ever effect us. I hate your family... I hate how
they're making us not able to see each other. I promise you though, I
will find a way to see you, I can't go without seeing my other half...
I love you so much, Sharon.
Please don't cry anymore.
Smile, like a beautiful girl like you is supposed to
Because, love,
In the end, everyone trying to separate us now, is going to fail,
because no matter what happens, we'll always love each other.
I love you.
--netzfan4life

Save me...

I can't take any of this anymore... save me...
I don't know what to do anymore...
Everyone's trying to take him away from me...
I don't know what to do anymore except cry...
Save me...
--mhshsho

Random

I know this is going to be random, but hey, it's what's on my mind. I'm
starting to feel that surreal feeling again, I can't believe that
Sharon's ACTUALLY mine, me of all people to have a girl who's so
beautiful, so amazing, so fun, so ideal, makes me feel so damn blessed.
I'm listening to the exact part of the exact same song that I listened
to the moment I started talking to her that February day, before the
snow day, and the moment we had made plans to see each other the day
ahead. Man... the memories are rushing through my head... I was a bit
tentative to talk to her that night, because though Sharon and I were
really close and comfortable with one another, I was always a bit shy
with her, being that I liked her so much and all. I remember that I
purposely told her how close I was to her house to see if she'd want to
see me, since she complained about not having any plans that day... wait
come to think of it, love, did you mention that you had no plans to see
how I'd react? Hmm... I wonder.
Anyways, we were chatting normally, and I told her where I was, and she
replied, saying these exact words, "Lemme stalk youuu..." Hehe, she's so
cute. I remember feeling so happy, abnormally happy, it was kind of
unreal actually. I couldn't wait to see her, to have her alone all to
myself. I wondered how we'd act, how I'd act, if I should make it
obvious that I liked her. I didn't know what to do, all I knew was that
I wanted to be with her so badly. Her and I spoke until 11 or so, and
she fell asleep, my princess wasn't nocturnal back then, so she would go
to sleep early. When she fell asleep, and after I spoke to her ex, who
shat his pants when he found out I was going to see Sharon, since he was
still obsessed and since he knew she once liked me, I stood up, staring
at the ceiling, thinking about how anxious I was about the next day. I
was so excited and nervous that I couldn't sleep. I thought about how
I'd get to hug her without interruption, think about making her smile
and giggle, seeing her beautiful face light up, I thought about how I
could make her happy and have her get closer to me because I really
wanted her to be mine. By the time I did fall asleep, I did settle on
one thing. I was going to kiss her lips like I had always dreamed of
doing, I was going to bestow a kiss upon her breathtaking pink lips no
matter what happened.
I'm so glad that I actually followed through with my plan. I'm so glad I
found out that we had the same hidden feelings for each other for so
long. I'm glad I got her. Listening to that part of the song reminded me
how lucky I am to have her, and just how happy I really am to have had
my dreams finally come true. I get butterflies in my stomach when I'd
think about the time her and I were just friends and then thinking about
how we are now. How I could do the things I've always wanted to do with
her, and her only. I can't say it enough, I'm so happy that Sharon's
mine. I'm never letting her go, I'll always treasure her and treat her
like the princess she really is.
I love you so fucking much hun, it's ridiculous. <3
I can't wait until the day I make you my bride
Until the day I take you away.
I used to think of the future as bleak and scary, but now, because of
you, I actually look forward to living on another day, to seeing where I
go in the future.
I love you, I can't say it enough.
I really, really love you, Sharon.
--netzfan4life

MC Jin - ABC

"Before The Worst."

I'm listening to "Before The Worst" by The Script. I love this song so much. It reflects how I feel. I want to pull out of this family. We have many good moments and I have fun with these people once in a while but I can't take it anymore. The bad moments in this apartment always outweigh everything else. I can't help that I'm not perfect and I can't help that they won't accept me for who and what I am. I have to pull out before something good happens again. I have to save myself the pain, save myself before anything else happens, before I destroy myself. I only have to live here for one more year and I can detach from this family completely. Only one more year and I will be officially legal. I have to bear with it. I won't be able to deal with the pain I receive every time I do something wrong and they degrade me. I can't take any more of the stress. I don't want to break down but if this continues, I won't be able to hold it all in. It already feels like it's going to burst. I really can't stand it anymore. I have to get out of here before something goes wrong and there won't be any way back. I've already dug myself into a deep enough hole. Any more of this and I won't be able to climb out anymore. Any more and the pile of dirt that had once filled the hole will topple over and bury me alive, head to toe.
I'm listening to "We Cry" by The Script now.
Kevin is trying to pull me out. He's doing his best to prevent me from crashing. He's holding me up and I need him to keep me sane. Right now, he's all I have. I don't want to bother Alyssa about it because she has her own problems. I don't want to burden her with my problems too. I don't want to bother Allison now that we're not too close anymore. I don't want to be a bother. I have to hold myself up, or at least try to. I really need Kevin's help. He's the only reason I'm still alive right now. He's the only reason I'm staying sane. He's my only hope. If he's gone, I don't know what I'll do. I don't how I'll live. I wont know how to deal with anything anymore. I can't stand it. I need him in my life, to keep me alive and functional. I know I'm being repetitive but it's true. He's all I have now. He's the only one I can be together with. The only one I can depend on completely. There's so much sadness in my life, I cry. I cry constantly. Once I start, I can't stop until he makes me stop. Until he makes me cheer up a little with his silly antics and his loving little kisses. He's my everything and I rely on him. I'd just be a useless shell that was shed by an animal, sitting alone on the beach, in the sand, letting people trample over me until there's nothing but shattered pieces of me left, mixing into the sand and washing away, different pieces spreading throughout the world, traveling through the oceans and ending up on another beach somewhere in the world, lost and without an idea where I am.
I just can't take the stress anymore. It's overwhelming now. There's nothing left in me. It's hard to make an effort. I'm not as strong as everyone else. I'm different. I can't hold myself up as well as everyone else can. I'm about to collapse. Hope really is too far gone now. Without Kevin, there will literally be nothing left.
Save me, love.
I used to soar in the sky, I used to fly. I  used to live. Now, my wings are clipped, there's a tag on my leg, a collar around my neck. My feathers are coming off, I'm losing my wings. They're becoming useless. I'm caged. All I can do now is curl up in the corner of my cage and cry, grasping desperately to my bear. All I can do now is let people poke at me with sticks, be forced to perform tricks. Hate me if you will, but don't take my bear from me. Don't take my teddy bear away from me. It's damaged and roughed up but it's still beautiful, it's still my treasure. He's still my treasure. Don't take it away from me.
Save me, love.

I'm so worried right now... so goddamn worried...
My Sharon hasn't responded to me in almost 2 hours now and I really hope
nothing happened. The last two days were absolutely a dream, I was in
such a state of bliss, everything was just so perfect with my love
before this bullshit happened. Stupid ass school, I swear, Sharon slips
up once and those bitches rat her out, meanwhile there are kids who do
10x worse shit and the school doesn't do a damn thing about it. Why her?
Why Sharon? What did she ever do to you guys? I hate it so much, her
family is such a pain in the ass too, they overreact so much for the
littlest things, they really need to lighten the fuck up and hop off, or
at least if they say the don't care, then they should stay true to their
word and stay the fuck shut. I can't wait until I marry her and take her
away from that shit, she really deserves to be treated like the princess
she is and I won't be fully happy until I she gets what she deserves
after so long.
I just really hope she's okay...
I love you, Sharon, I'm really sorry this happened...
We'll get through this and it'll be worth it in the end, I promise.
I love you... please be okay, my beloved.
--netzfan4life

"It Felt So Good."

Yes, my title is weird. There was nothing meant from it. I just wanted to write it. xD
I had a great day today. That's all. I felt so happy and satisfied for once in a long time, aside from my snow days with Kevin and the moment we had our first kiss together. At that specific moment, I thought I was in heaven, that nothing mattered anymore and that I was alive. That I was worth something. Kevin brings out the liveliness in me. I love him.
We ate tacos today. It. Was. Nom. TASTIC. Yes, I do sound like my love now. Like... my way of speech and the way I act. He kind of acts and talks like me, too. Amusing, right? I know! Well, after I finished eating tacos, I waited for my love to recover from his abundance of tacos, and extras. I recovered fast and started chowing on his quesadilla. Bwehehe. But yeah. It was yummyy~!!! Then I was the one to suffer from the fullness. My bottomless pit just grew a bottom today.
Satisfied.
Yupyup. Very much so. I love tacos!! ;D

Close.

Though my love and I have had our fair share of rough spots, miss
understandings, and minor drama, I could honestly say that all of that
bullshit only brought us closer, and the make up had been worth all of
the tears and frowns that were created during such time. Because of
what's happened, we spoke about things and feelings we hid from each
other, concerns, and a whole lot of other things on our minds, which
made us a lot more comfortable with one another. I don't know, there's
just something about our connection that never allows us to stay upset
with one another, that allows us to always make up and become even
closer and love one another even more than before. God... I love her so
much <3
This Thursday, my love and I went to her sister's job to get a bunch of
invites for her wedding and stuff. We sat, waited around for awhile,
laughed, hugged, and kissed in front of her co-workers, before the
receptionist called for her sister to come meet us. We held hands when
she came in, which made me really happy, got the stuff, and then I
personally spoke to her about letting my babe go to prom with me. She
said how she'd talk to her mom and how Sharon had to behave for her to
ask, so I said fine, and left with my love when she came back from the
bathroom. We walked around 34th for a bit, made our way into Victoria's
Secret, where my love browsed a whole lot. I kinda like going there... I
always try to picture the underwear and lingerie on my love's sexy,
slender body, and that really... makes me happy. Being the jerk she is,
she told me how when she gets her money, she's going to buy some nice
underwear for me, and tease me by wearing them around me... she's so
mean... x3
After we left, we went to McDonalds. We shared a 10pc mean with a large
and medium fries, and of course, my love doused the damn fries with a
shit load of salt and pepper. I'm kind of a messy eater, so at times,
I'd have some salt or pepper lingering on my lips. Instead of wiping it
off with a napkin, my love decided to lean over the table, and suck and
lip the salt and pepper off of my lips for me. I don't know why, but
that made me really happy. I love how we cold be weird dorks in public
and not give a shit who sees, I love how comfortable we are together,
and I love how we're not only lovers, but best friends as well. I love
you, babe, you really are the best thing to ever happen to me, and I
won't let you go.
--netzfan4life

Most awkward doctor visit... ever.

Last week, my love and I took a visit to her doctor's office to get the
results from a blood test she took that past Friday. Originally, Sharon
was supposed to go with her mom, but since she had to take a make up
test for Ms. Moore's class, her mom's lazy ass decided she could go on
her own. After fighting with her, saying she wasn't going to let her go
alone, she decided to stay home because my love was going to be a couple
of minutes late. What an ass. Anyways, her and I got to the doctor's
office pretty quickly, went upstairs, and sat in the waiting room,
patiently sitting while we waited to be called. Oh, did I mention that
the office was in THE HEART OF CHINATOWN?! I stuck out like a sore
thumb. I was 6'2", everyone else was 5'5ish, I was White, everyone was
Asian, and I was the only one with the most beautiful girl in town.
After a bit of playing around, flirting, giggling, and a whole lot of
smiling, it was preeeeety obvious that the cute little asian girl and I
were way more than just friends. Needless to say, everyone, kids, old
people, everyone was staring at us like we had a dead cat on our heads.
I wonder what they were thinking... o.o
Anyways, After a bit, her doctor came out, saw me laying on Sharon's
lap, and figured I was her boyfriend, so he invited me inside to talk
with them. He chatted with her about the results, what she had and
didn't have, what she needed, and what she should do. After a bit, he
asked Sharon to give him a urine sample, leaving him and I alone. This
wasn't fun... okay, maybe just a bit.
He shut the door and began shooting away with questions. First he asked,
"so do you use protection all the time?" I said yes. I already knew what
to say due to what Sharon told me he asked and what her answers were
before, but that didn't really make it any better. He then asked, while
pacing around the room, "how many times do you guys do it?" I muttered,
"once a week", knowing that my answer wouldn't make him happy. He gave
me a look, and then said, "Oh... wow... you two are so young... you
shouldn't be so active, you guys should take breaks." I said "yeah,
we'll talk about it"... sike ;D
Right after that, my babe walked in, and he stopped quizzing. He told
her more about her conditions, gave us a prescription for birth control,
and then let us be on our way. We left, picked up the birth control, and
walked home, after a strange... strange day.
Btw... I have to say this...
WOOOOOOOOOOOT WE FINALLY GOT THE FUCKING BIRTH CONTROL
YEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSS~!!

hehe...<3
--netzfan4life

:D

I gots the ring, wooooooooooot~!!
It's so pweety, I bet it's going to look better on her left ring finger
though <3
--netzfan4life

Daily bread.

Right now it's about 6th period back at the high school, I think. Thank
God that my mom and dad decided to get freaky when they did, cause being
a senior, well right now at least, is to say the least, epic. I haven't
had class for a week, I have alllllllllll the free time I want, all day,
everyday, while those poor poor high schoolers, including Sharon, still
have to go to school and work their asses off. Hah, so fun being old!
;]
But yeah, I'm at Elizabeth Center right now, where I just ordered the
ring that I've been saving up to place on Sharon's pretty little finger.
I hustled my mom for the money, making her give me a bit more than usual
since I'm going away for the weekend, and mustered JUST enough out of
her for the perfect amount for that ring. I'm so happy.
I've been walking around the little mall, if you wanna call it that, for
about 10ish minutes or so because I'm still waiting for the ring to
finish getting engraved, and while walking, I've seen some pretty cool
stuff. I browsed around the video game store, seeing that they REALLY
need to update their damn stock, checked out the model, toy models for
all you pervy thinkers out there, and the lone clothing store, which I
must say is kinda kick ass. Oh did I mention how I found a WHOLE GODDAMN
CLOUD COLLECTION?! It's so cool... I felt like sucha nerd for staring at
it so hard and for so long, but hey, he's worth it :]
Anyways, after I was done looking at what I wanted to, I just started
walking around endlessly, staring at random things. I stopped at a
place, which at the front, said, "I do weddings" and when I looked a bit
more inside, I saw a whole lot of lovey dovey, and stuff that you'd see
at a wedding. As soon as I saw that, I instantly thought of my love. I
thought about our future together, how we were going to live together,
at first in a tiny studio somewhere in queens, and eventually move into
a house maybe in California, or maybe something bigger in the city. I
thought about all the moments we're going to have together, the food and
places we're going to try, and most of all, just being able to sleep in
the same bed as her. Being able to be the last one to say good night,
whispering "I love you" into her ear and giving her a little kiss, then
watching her doze off on my chest and then falling alseep soon after. I
can't wait until I get to do that. I can't wait until I get to see her
walk down the isle towards me in her white dress, eyes glistening while
she stares at me smiling. I can't wait, I love Sharon so much and the
only future I'd ever want is a future with her.
--netzfan4life

Blogs.

I have two blogs to do tonight, just putting it here as a reminder for
myself. I also wanted to say how I'm going to go to Elizabeth Center
sometime today to finally get my beloved's ring. Her ring is going to be
identical to the one she got me, I posted the pictures up awhile ago, so
you guys should know what it'll look like. Ahh I can't wait to put that
ring onto her finger!! :D<3
--netzfan4life